Heavyweight Championship

Lazer “the paaaaarty Rad Burrito vs Herr Ehrfucht vs Dr. Dragoberto Deuttsche

Lazer “the paaaarty” Rad BurritoLazer “the paaaarty” Rad Burrito

Paaaty paaaty paaaty paaaty paaaty. My friends call me The Party, but my real name is Lazer Rad Burrito. You can call me whatever you like because I like everything. Haha actually I mainly just like to surf and party. I also like burritos and smoking fatty js too. Oh I also like girls but mostly just hot ones. Haha paaty paaaty paaty paaaty. I hail from San Diego, California and I love to RAGE BALLS!! One of my bros taught me how to take eye shots of vodka, so I have been practicing that alot lately. It’s pretty gnarly. I like clothes with bright colors because they are fun to look at and drunk chicks love em. Stay raw doggin!!!
I don’t hate much, but I can’t stand barnicles. You know, boring people who don’t party. I also hate it when people leave half drunken cans of beer around, haha well actually its not that bad because I just drink them. Hahaha paaty paaaty paaty. My greatest weakness is my love for hot women but thats not really a weakness unless you like guys. But I don’t like guys. Hahaha paaaty paaty. Oh I almost forgot, I hate people that kill animals and I also hate assholes. I fucking hate assholes. Haha I mean I like mine, cause it feels kinda funny when I lay fat turds, but you know, assholes like agro dudes who always wanna start fights. I just wanna love, and paaaty, so fuck assholes.

I am here at Wrestlepocalypse because I heard its an epic paaaaaaaatttttyyyy. I heard the ring girls have big booties and If I win my round I bet I could get get naked and raw dog one of them. So basically, whoever I fight is fucked because Im hard core gnarly score of 10. So stoked to party with you all. Watch out for my sucka punch to the jaw and my rage titties smackdown moves. Fuck barnicles stay
paaaaaaaatttyyyy!!!!!!!

Herr Ehrfurcht

Born in Ingolstadt. Where my parents abandon me, I was left in a dumpster. But a miracle then took place, I was found by Dr. Dragoberto Deutsche. This wonderfull man took me in and turned me into a machine. Because off all the tests and training I have experiences through out my life, I had no time to learn academics. I have never had any outside contact with the world; Dr. D is all I know. Herr Ehrfurcht is emotionally challenged; I have no feelings. Dr. Deutsches un-orthodox training techniques have turned me into a monster. I am the strongest, fastest, most feared man of all thy world. I can and will not be stopped.

Dr. Dragoberto Deutsche

I was born and raised in Kaiserslautern, Germany. I attended school at Ludwig-Maximilian University in Munich, Germany. I received a degree in Kinesiology along with a Neurological Science degree. I am the smartest man in all of Germany but I get no respect. That is why I am here, at Wrestlepocalypse III, to prove that my creation is the absolute best. I was shunned by much of Germany after my war machines did not successfully intimidate the United States into submission during the Cold War Era. I have been working tirelessly for redemption. I have given up drinking, smoking, and pretty much all that is wrong with Americans. I have been sober for nearly 20 years now and will destroy anyone who dismisses my idea of sobriety. For the last 20 years, I have been raising a young boy that was left in a dumpster by his mother near to the town of Ingolstadt, Germany. I have raised him to train, and he trains only to destroy the United States of America who caused my Cold Way failure. I have injected him with the best steroids and have given him Human Growth Hormones since he could walk. He is now ready, with my guidance, to take over the largest corporation in the United States, Wrestlepocalypse. The only thing left for me to do was to find funding for the final touches on my creation. That is when I found Werner Von McMann He has agreed to take care of all my expenses as long as my creation does not fail. He will not fail. I will not fail. We will not fail. We will be victorious. Wir werden siegen! Wir werden siegen! Wir werden siegen!